It hurts my heart to see you suffer like this. Watching you go through this is like watching someone on a continuous roller coaster ride that they just can’t get off of. I wish I could offer you some sage advice or wise counsel to help you through your suffering. But all I can come up with is what we both already know; that God has a plan, and even though we may not understand it until hindsight, we trust, we both know that all of this is not for nothing.
What I can offer you though, is my presence as you go through this tough time. I promise I won’t be uncomfortable in your pain as you lay it our there bare for me and all to witness. I will listen, I will be here for you. However, what I cannot offer you, is co-miseration in your pain. Because doing so would prolong the ride, and hold you there suspended in your suffering. It doesn’t matter though, you’re not looking for pity, you are wise. I see you looking for a way through the suffering, to wholeness. To get off the ride. Perhaps, that is why we are friends. We can empathize with each other on the deepest level, revealing our vulnerabilities and pain without fear of judgment, while at the same time working to make ourselves whole. We help each other see our blind spots. The dark places we need to bring into the light of day in order to become whole. Healing isn’t easy, it requires ripping off the bandage and letting the air in. Sometimes though, it just has to get worse before it gets better. Maybe it’s the only way to becoming whole again. It is known that the most painful experiences help us grow the most. We understand that. Even though we may not understand God’s plan; we trust, we both know that all of this is not for nothing.
What I want you to know is that I am so proud of you, at how far you’ve come. I am proud of you for recognizing the pattern that’s been showing up throughout your life, though disguised, it’s played out in many forms and you’ve come to recognize it. This time though, it is playing out at the highest octave and the stakes are high, but it’s not your fault. Maybe the pattern has repeated itself because you couldn’t recognize it or deep down you didn’t want to recognize it, because you weren’t ready to deal with it, you weren’t prepared. Perhaps, the pattern has repeated itself so that you could learn what you needed to learn in small doses to prepare yourself for what you have to face now. It really doesn’t matter how you became aware, all that matters now, is that you are aware because everything you hold dear is at stake. You are being pushed into action and this time, with eyes wide open. You’re determined to rip off that bandage, heal and move forward. To get off that rollercoaster. God has a plan and you are exactly where you are meant to be in this very moment. I know this because I trust and I know that all of this is not for nothing.
I want you to know that I admire your strength and courage to look within for the answers. You’re not placing blame on outside circumstances or blaming another person. Your ability to vent without complaining shows your resolve, that you understand that what you have to endure today doesn’t have to be your future. I can see that you are gaining traction and this ride is almost over. You will get through this and you will be the better for it. And though it may be a long ways off, perhaps someday you’ll even come to appreciate the experience; to see the silver lining in this part of God’s plan. For now, just trust and know that all of this is not for nothing.
With warm love and regards.
Yours in Friendship,
Thanks for sharing this, Brandi. That is really touching and comforting.
LikeLiked by 1 person
What a wonderful post Brandi… Barbara x
LikeLiked by 1 person
How much love you have for your friend- sometimes friends need someone just to be there.